Online Sequencer Forums

Full Version: Things You Did Not Know About Me.
You're currently viewing a stripped down version of our content. View the full version with proper formatting.
Pages: 1 2
Why do you guys hate vaccinations?
also, why this banter, this guy has explained himself and you guys are bloody talking about him behind his back...

Not cool

another reason why I have lost hope for our race.

-Tobias
i mean tbh i can't take this post seriously when it feels like he's copying symptoms down from mayo clinic, not to be rude to people who have aspergers syndrome but i mean just tell people you have it.

there's no specific explaining needing to be done since people can just look it up themselves. a lot of dsm stuff share similar symptoms so when people go on posing with it online, it doesn't seem to be well received because of how most people on this site generally are hormonal

also a lot of this post is actually pretty pretentious as people who call themselves "superior" at anything shouldn't do that without further proof

call me a jackass or whatever, but i really want to be honest about it. i must say that while none of these things that abyss explains about himself are bad things, i just really hate the way he presents his interests as things he ""excels"" at
You know what? ***** it, at this point I've waited long enough, and this may be the best opportunity to just say it... I have Autism 1 as well (formerly aspergers/high functioning whatever tf u wanna call it). You may have seen some of the signs, such as how I rarely ever really talk to anybody (although that can be attributed to all of the College work I have to do), or how I seem to make some weird attempts at humor, and, well, now you know. The Great Wall of Text incoming.

I'm pretty sure alot of the OS community has it, if this forum is to go by, and seeing that this is the case, I feel slightly more comfortable sharing this. Having said that, I kinda hid my autism away, because in real life, it is often the first thing people think of when they think of me. Although I haven't really been bullied that much (many times they were actually two sided- I know how to somewhat stand up for myself), the majority of people that know me oftentimes speak to me as an autistic man, rather than just, you know, a man.

And I'm not talking about being made fun of; I'm talking about how I'm misunderstood, along with the way I process and interact with the world. Although I am much more understood now, it used to be extremely rare that I got the same amount of respect and understanding as normal people usually get. People would often speak to me in that annoying ass high-pitched tone in the most simple language, as if I am stupid. Either that, or they give me free passes whenever I do things that simply aren't ok (breaking ***** when angry), because I'm AUtIsTIc ANd I dON't kNOW AnY bETtEr.

Obviously, this isn't how the real world works, as some of my best friends have helped me to realize (I have mad respect for them). Hypothetically If I got angry at Apple pulling their typical ***** with their iPhones and decided to trash an Apple store to take my anger out, nobody would give a ***** that I had autism; I would have potentially costed that store thousands upon thousands of dollars in damages, and my ass would be hauled off to jail to await trial, assuming I could handle the incarceration process. Needless to say, I needed to learn how to actually function, and as of now... I have. Mostly. I still have yet to have a real job, beyond the three internships I have participated in over the years, but I am making progress, and in a few years, I will most likely be independent.

But perhaps my biggest pet peeve is when people pretend to praise me, and the things I do, simply because I have autism, and they want to boost their own image. I can tell when people do this when they give nothing but brief "positive" feedback on something I made, or when they pretend to be nice to me when I'm around, yet when they don't need to deal with me, they ignore me and pretend I don't exist. Unfortunately, this has led to me not getting a good idea of what is actually good and bad about the work I have done.

That is why I decided to not open up about it on the internet, until now, and instead I decided to just, you know, shut up and make music, or in the case of Krunker.io (a browser fps that allows you to make maps, where I've been more active in recently), shut up and make maps (I told myself to shut up; nobody else did). This is because I wanted to remove any pre-emptive labels (beyond the tradition of adding "(JHXC)" in the titles), and avoiding poisoning the well, or sugarcoating it beforehand. That way, everybody would listen to/play my work, and have unbiased opinions. I wanted to see how people actually felt about my hobby, and what I make, not just what other people wanted me to think they feel. In other words, I wanted people to like my music & maps in spite of my autism, not because of my autism.

In fact, the way I see it, people with Autism, or really people in general, are all like bowls of Lucky Charms*. They have these gross grain thingamabobs that range from forgettable to disgusting. Then there are the marshmallows, which are the delicious parts of the cereal that everybody knows and loves. There aren't nearly as many of them in there, but they definitely make up for the lackluster honey-nut cheerio wannabes shaped as math symbols. Those grain pieces represent the not so good things about people (in my case, it's my autism, as well as all the undesirable quirks that come with it), while the marshmallows represent the best things about people that should be what people remember about them (in my case, these would be my talents, my music, my maps, my YouTube videos (It's been over a year since I started that JHXC channel, and despite the fact I don't upload my OS songs on there anymore, it's actually doing pretty well), and all of the other things people would find to be good about me).

I could go on a whole deeper adventure down the rabbit hole with that analogy, as there are many things that it could relate to when it comes to humanity and how we all refuse to see the marshmallows in each other, and how certain "gross thingamabobs" do, in fact, nullify the marshmallows (like committing serious crimes such as murder, rape, etc...) etc... But this is already a novel, so I'm going to leave this Great Wall Of Text at this: All I really want is for people to recognize and accept that I do, in fact, have autism, but also to remember me for what I have done, and who I am, rather than by my autism, or whatever labels I have been given.



*P.S. A little side note: I actually thought of this "Lucky Charms" analogy all the way back in freshmen year (April 2015, around that time) for a school project. It was inspired by a little known YouTuber named ProJared. Yep, that guy. I used to be a huge fan of him, and his Sonic Adventure 2 Video had a similar "Lucky Charms" analogy that inspired my take on it. Granted, when all that insane stuff about ProJared supposedly cheating on his wife, among other spicier things, came out, I almost lost it myself, until ProJared dealt the single most epic NO U in history and proved his innocence, but aside from that, that was the video that inspired it.


*frantically rushes to the nearest water fountain to treat my throat*
(09-30-2019, 07:37 PM)JHXC Wrote: [ -> ]You know what? ***** it, at this point I've waited long enough, and this may be the best opportunity to just say it... I have Autism 1 as well (formerly aspergers/high functioning whatever tf u wanna call it). You may have seen some of the signs, such as how I rarely ever really talk to anybody (although that can be attributed to all of the College work I have to do), or how I seem to make some weird attempts at humor, and, well, now you know. The Great Wall of Text incoming.

I'm pretty sure alot of the OS community has it, if this forum is to go by, and seeing that this is the case, I feel slightly more comfortable sharing this. Having said that, I kinda hid my autism away, because in real life, it is often the first thing people think of when they think of me. Although I haven't really been bullied that much (many times they were actually two sided- I know how to somewhat stand up for myself), the majority of people that know me oftentimes speak to me as an autistic man, rather than just, you know, a man.

And I'm not talking about being made fun of; I'm talking about how I'm misunderstood, along with the way I process and interact with the world. Although I am much more understood now, it used to be extremely rare that I got the same amount of respect and understanding as normal people usually get. People would often speak to me in that annoying ass high-pitched tone in the most simple language, as if I am stupid. Either that, or they give me free passes whenever I do things that simply aren't ok (breaking ***** when angry), because I'm AUtIsTIc ANd I dON't kNOW AnY bETtEr.

Obviously, this isn't how the real world works, as some of my best friends have helped me to realize (I have mad respect for them). Hypothetically If I got angry at Apple pulling their typical ***** with their iPhones and decided to trash an Apple store to take my anger out, nobody would give a ***** that I had autism; I would have potentially costed that store thousands upon thousands of dollars in damages, and my ass would be hauled off to jail to await trial, assuming I could handle the incarceration process. Needless to say, I needed to learn how to actually function, and as of now... I have. Mostly. I still have yet to have a real job, beyond the three internships I have participated in over the years, but I am making progress, and in a few years, I will most likely be independent.

But perhaps my biggest pet peeve is when people pretend to praise me, and the things I do, simply because I have autism, and they want to boost their own image. I can tell when people do this when they give nothing but brief "positive" feedback on something I made, or when they pretend to be nice to me when I'm around, yet when they don't need to deal with me, they ignore me and pretend I don't exist. Unfortunately, this has led to me not getting a good idea of what is actually good and bad about the work I have done.

That is why I decided to not open up about it on the internet, until now, and instead I decided to just, you know, shut up and make music, or in the case of Krunker.io (a browser fps that allows you to make maps, where I've been more active in recently), shut up and make maps (I told myself to shut up; nobody else did). This is because I wanted to remove any pre-emptive labels (beyond the tradition of adding "(JHXC)" in the titles), and avoiding poisoning the well, or sugarcoating it beforehand. That way, everybody would listen to/play my work, and have unbiased opinions. I wanted to see how people actually felt about my hobby, and what I make, not just what other people wanted me to think they feel. In other words, I wanted people to like my music & maps in spite of my autism, not because of my autism.

In fact, the way I see it, people with Autism, or really people in general, are all like bowls of Lucky Charms*. They have these gross grain thingamabobs that range from forgettable to disgusting. Then there are the marshmallows, which are the delicious parts of the cereal that everybody knows and loves. There aren't nearly as many of them in there, but they definitely make up for the lackluster honey-nut cheerio wannabes shaped as math symbols. Those grain pieces represent the not so good things about people (in my case, it's my autism, as well as all the undesirable quirks that come with it), while the marshmallows represent the best things about people that should be what people remember about them (in my case, these would be my talents, my music, my maps, my YouTube videos (It's been over a year since I started that JHXC channel, and despite the fact I don't upload my OS songs on there anymore, it's actually doing pretty well), and all of the other things people would find to be good about me).

I could go on a whole deeper adventure down the rabbit hole with that analogy, as there are many things that it could relate to when it comes to humanity and how we all refuse to see the marshmallows in each other, and how certain "gross thingamabobs" do, in fact, nullify the marshmallows (like committing serious crimes such as murder, rape, etc...) etc... But this is already a novel, so I'm going to leave this Great Wall Of Text at this: All I really want is for people to recognize and accept that I do, in fact, have autism, but also to remember me for what I have done, and who I am, rather than by my autism, or whatever labels I have been given.



*P.S. A little side note: I actually thought of this "Lucky Charms" analogy all the way back in freshmen year (April 2015, around that time) for a school project. It was inspired by a little known YouTuber named ProJared. Yep, that guy. I used to be a huge fan of him, and his Sonic Adventure 2 Video had a similar "Lucky Charms" analogy that inspired my take on it. Granted, when all that insane stuff about ProJared supposedly cheating on his wife, among other spicier things, came out, I almost lost it myself, until ProJared dealt the single most epic NO U in history and proved his innocence, but aside from that, that was the video that inspired it.


*frantically rushes to the nearest water fountain to treat my throat*
the patronizing is the worst
"And I'm not talking about being made fun of; I'm talking about how I'm misunderstood, along with the way I process and interact with the world. Although I am much more understood now, it used to be extremely rare that I got the same amount of respect and understanding as normal people usually get. People would often speak to me in that annoying ass high-pitched tone in the most simple language, as if I am stupid. Either that, or they give me free passes whenever I do things that simply aren't ok (breaking ***** when angry), because I'm AUtIsTIc ANd I dON't kNOW AnY bETtEr.

But perhaps my biggest pet peeve is when people pretend to praise me, and the things I do, simply because I have autism, and they want to boost their own image. I can tell when people do this when they give nothing but brief "positive" feedback on something I made, or when they pretend to be nice to me when I'm around, yet when they don't need to deal with me, they ignore me and pretend I don't exist. Unfortunately, this has led to me not getting a good idea of what is actually good and bad about the work I have done."


I can't stand when people do this. I can imagine it would be much worse if someone is doing it to you. I feel sorry you have to put up with this.
Another thing.

Being the oldest brother is a living hell. Your younger brothers will wish they were older, I say nope. Stick with being a younger sibling because being the oldest means that you have more responsibilities.
Pages: 1 2