On Friday of August 16th 1997 at 9:25 p.m., Mr. Squarepants got off his shift at the Krusty Krab & visited the nearest convenience store, purchased 2 packs of Newports, a Snickers bar, & 4 bottles of Jack Daniels. He can be seen leaving the premises at 9:31 inconspicuously entering his motor vehicle, however, things take a turn when Mr. Squarepants merges onto the interstate & accelerates to 95 mph, haphazardly weaving between lanes with little to no regard for other drivers. Mr. Squarepants in the wake of his rampage commits upwards of 17 hit & runs, leaving 12 injured & miraculously no fatalities. Luck eventually catches up to Mr. Squarepants when he rear-ends an 18 wheeler totaling his vehicle immediately. Had Mr. Squarepants not have been absorbant & yellow & pourous. He most certainly would've been dead on impact. Unfortunantly for him, he lived long enough for law enforcement to catch up and was promptly arrested for operating a motor vehicle with a blood-alcohol level of 0.16%.
Mr. Squarepants was successfully detained & brought to justice where he served a life sentence without the possibility of parole. That was until 4 years later on September 15th of 2001, Mr. Squarepants vanished from his cell. He hasn't been seen ever since.
